on love
Growing up queer, and in the closet, I thought I would never find romantic love, simply because I was taught that it was wrong. I wanted to understand, feel, and relate to love, but I didn’t think I would ever have access to it. Discovering what love was and what it meant for me started with healing the damage caused by years of homophobic thinking, which, ultimately, meant learning to love all parts of myself.
I’ll never forget saying the words “I love you” to a partner for the first time, and I’ll never forget the day that relationship ended. I’ll always remember those moments– the many beginnings and endings– the pursuit of love. Slowly, I started exploring this in my work, and with more intention over time. That investigation began with painting, but it has since expanded to photography, sound, video, writing, installation, design, performance, and participatory actions and elements.
From 2015 to 2017, I explored the idea of love and loss as a way of documenting, processing, and better understanding my experiences with it. The autobiographical paintings included letters, photos, clothes, and other collected material from specific moments in the romantic relationships that occurred during that time. I used tiny painted color marks to slowly bury and preserve the material, turning it into something else entirely. Sentences blurred into fragmented words, words became simplified shapes, and sometimes, there was nothing left to see underneath layers of patterned mark making. Solo shows that featured this work were: Love Letters and Broken Things, A Way of Saying Goodbye, and Return to Winter.
In 2018, I opened a public call for handwritten love letters. It was a way to connect with others about the many ways we fall in love, break, and heal. After the project was posted, I started receiving more than just letters. Things like photos, books, articles, music, movie, and podcast recommendations came in rapidly. The project quickly became bigger than myself. It allowed for connection, conversation, and healing for myself and so many others. That year, I exhibited a selection of this work in a solo exhibition titled Punctuated Gestures.
In 2019, I created an installation in the Writing Studio at Montserrat College of Art as a way of inspiring more writing on love. It was my first public installation that included original handwritten letters, photos, writing, books, unfinished paintings, and an audio recording. I also began designing a book, titled On Love, which features documentation of the elements included in the installation.
In 2020, I exhibited another selection of this work in a solo show titled Easy to Love. The work included in the exhibition focused on my connection with my partner of two years.
In 2021, I finished my book, On Love, which can be purchased online. I also launched the second iteration of the open call for love letters with a focus on digital “letters” and the many ways we connect online.
Follow me on Instagram at @kevinjlucey for more immediate updates.
If you would like to mail a physical love letter, reach out at kevin@kevinjlucey.com to receive my mailing address.
